Mr. Big Read online

  “I don’t understand.”

  Xander studied her carefully. “You’re here to learn, right? And to push your boundaries?”

  Abbie nodded.

  “Then try something new. Have a look through those two books. Jonathan Frazier is one of my favorite photographers. The first one is a book of his landscapes. The other is of his portraits. Next meeting, tell me which ones moved you the most.” He glanced at the clock. “It looks like our time is up for today.”

  Wow, an hour had gone by that quickly? “Sure. I can do that.” She thanked him and picked up her bag to leave.

  He stopped her in the doorway. “Abbie.” His voice was low as he leaned forward. “You can’t photograph honestly when you’re shuttered from the world. You’ll have to open yourself and show your vulnerability to hit your true potential.”

  Abbie tipped her chin up. “I can do that.” At least she could try. Landscapes had always been easy for her, but if he wanted to push her, then fine. She’d get some portraits done. Even as she waved goodbye, her brain was already formulating a plan for the kinds of portraits she might be able to do.

  Checking her watch again, she hurried out of the media building to meet Ilani for lunch. She’d already hit up most of the campus spots for a potential job before her meeting with Xander. Hopefully, something would come up in the next couple of days.

  Her friend arrived mere seconds after she did. “So how did your meeting go with Mr. I’d-consider-a threesome-for-you Chase?”

  Abbie barked out a laugh as she and Ilani grabbed a seat at the campus café. “Seriously, Ilani?”

  The blonde shrugged. “I’m not into girls, but if that man asked me, I’d say hell yes, whatever you want. Come on, he’s certainly worth the shag.”

  “You’re ridiculous. Have you had your meeting with him yet?”

  Ilani shook her head. “Mine’s this afternoon.”

  Abbie eyed her friend. Ilani had gone for a short corduroy skirt and low-cut fitted sweater. “I see you dressed to impress.”

  Ilani beamed. “Well, you have to put your best assets on display and see what happens. I mean, he might have said he’s not interested, but I know for a fact he’s slept with a student before.”

  Intrigued, Abbie leaned forward. “Really? Who?”

  Ilani glanced around surreptitiously. “She was a year ahead of me and in his undergraduate class. Rumor is, she made him an offer he couldn’t refuse.“

  “So what happened with her?”

  Ilani shrugged. “Well Xander is notorious. Maybe she couldn’t keep up.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “Okay, fine, she caught him with some model on a shoot and went ballistic on him.”

  “Explain ballistic.”

  “Well, rumor is that their little tryst was all about woman on top. She allegedly grabbed the model by the hair and yanked her clean off Xander, then well, threatened him with bodily harm if you know what I mean.” Ilani waggled her eyebrows. “She went completely mental. Screaming and shouting that she was going to end his career. Of course, she’s the one who was carted off. He emerged unscathed.”

  That sounded like something from a soap opera. “Don’t you think if all that happened, he’d be a lot less likely to sleep with another student?”

  Ilani grinned. “Difference is, I only want him for his body. I have no desire for a relationship of any kind. What about you?”

  The waitress arrived with water and took their orders.

  Abbie shook her head. “Oh, I’m off relationships. I just got out of a bad one, and I’m not eager to repeat the experience.”

  “Oh no, I meant Xander. What do you want him for?”

  “Xander? The only thing I want from him is an excellent job recommendation, if not a job, by the end of the year. Other than that, he’s all yours.”

  Ilani studied her. “Are you sure about that?”

  Abbie frowned and shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “What do you mean?”

  Her new friend shrugged. “It means I saw you guys in the hall earlier. It looked like he might kiss you or something.”

  Abbie blinked. “No. He was not going to kiss me. He was busy imparting some knowledge about how I’ll need to be more vulnerable. Besides, I’m not interested. I’m staying far away from guys right now. He’s all yours.”

  “If you say so. But from where I was standing, he looked plenty interested in you.”

  The look of seriousness on Ilani’s face was the only thing keeping Abbie from laughing out loud. “I promise you he’s not. I’m just a student to him. Besides, with that skirt on, you’re sure to catch his attention.”

  Ilani looked temporarily mollified, but then she added, “Look, all kidding aside, you seem like the kind of girl who would get hurt. I like you, and I don’t want to see that happen. Just be careful.”

  36

  “You ready for dinner?” Lex asked his brother as he narrowly avoided stepping on a box of lens filters.

  “Yeah, just let me put away the student portfolios,” Xander replied.

  Lex looked around his brother’s tiny office. “Just where do you plan on putting them, Xander? It’s not like you have a lot of room in here.”

  “Take the piss all you want, mate. I have a system.” He stuck the portfolios on an already overflowing shelf. “Besides, it’s not like I have an assistant right now. Most of this stuff will move to my studio anyway. Once that’s done, it’ll be downright neat in here.”

  Lex just laughed. “Sure. Whatever you say.”

  His brother studied him as they left his office and took the back hall to the staff parking lot. “So, what’s with you?”

  Lex shoved his hands into his pockets and kept his gaze looking ahead. He didn’t need Xander probing into the dark recesses of his mind. “Nothing. Why do you ask?”

  Xander dropped his camera bag in the boot, then strolled around to the driver’s side of his Pagani Huayra. “Seriously, Alexi? You seem to forget it’s my job to study the nuances of human features and emotion then capture those moments.”

  Lex wasn’t in the mood for his brother’s attempts at psychoanalysis. He carefully opened the passenger door of the Huayra. The car was both the fastest and the flashiest of Xander’s vehicles. Lex preferred to run around in something more subtle, but his brother liked the attention. Although, Lex had to admit, the thing was cool.

  “I’m not biting, Xander. Let it go.”

  “I can’t. It’s written all over your face. The tight set of your mouth. When you smile, it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. Your body has a rigidity to it. Especially in your shoulders. Like you’re poised and ready to take action on something. Not to mention you’re fidgety as hell.”

  Lex immediately stopped playing with the hem on his hoodie. “I am not fidgety.”

  “Come on. Why don’t you just tell me what it is? Is it Gemma?”

  Lex was careful to keep his voice neutral. “When did you become an agony aunt? I’m fine.”

  Xander narrowed his eyes and studied him as they came to the stop sign at the campus exit. “No, it’s not Gemma, but it is a woman. Go ahead and tell me I’m wrong.”

  “You’re wrong.” He kept his face averted toward the window. Maybe dinner with his brother had been a bad idea.

  “You forget I know you better than anyone. Who is she?”

  Lex dropped his head against the headrest. “She’s no one. Just a girl. I don’t even know her name.” But as luck would have it, he’d seen her with Max’s girlfriend. So if he was so inclined he could track her down.

  Xander shook his head. “See, I’ve got the skills of a detective. Maybe when this photography thing is over I should join Scotland Yard. Screw that I’m going big. MI-6 all the way.”

  Despite himself, Lex laughed. “You’re full of shit.”

  “Maybe, but I figured out some woman is tying you in knots. Gemma got a clue?”

  Xander was the only one who knew the truth behind his relationship with Gemma. And he thought
Lex was insane to go along with it. “There’s nothing to tell Gemma. I haven’t done anything. And I’m not going to.” He said through ground teeth. He couldn’t pursue it. He wanted it too much.

  “Yeah right. You’ve got the look of a man on a tight string.” His brother shook his head as he easily navigated the streets of Ealing on his way to the motorway. “Though I have to say, I like this look on you.”

  Lex frowned. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  “Oh, I dunno. I feel like you’ve used your relationship with Gemma as an excuse to never get close to anyone. Sure you have a discrete dalliance here, a hot fling there, but you’ve never had to be in a real relationship. With someone you care about, who would actually have to get to know the real you.”

  “Shut it, Xander.”

  His brother laughed. “Why? Because I’m telling you the truth? You are avoiding intimacy because you’re afraid of what you’ll have to show and share. It’s classic.”

  Lex rolled his eyes. “Oh, I’m the one with love issues? Says the man who goes through women like you’ve heard there will be a store closing on them or something.”

  Xander grinned. “I do love women. But we weren’t talking about me. Besides, I’ve turned over a new leaf. Women are to be treated with respect. We were talking about you and some woman getting under your skin. It’s a good look for you.”

  “Wow, Xan, I had no idea you were such a romantic.” He eyed his brother again. “Shit, you’re not sleeping with another one of your students, are you?”

  Xander’s eyes bugged. “No! Hell no. I learned my lesson the first time.”

  Lex laughed. “You know they have those rules for a reason.”

  “I said I’m not fucking sleeping with her.”

  “Her, so there’s a her?”

  Xander cursed. “No. I have a student. She’s promising, that’s it.”

  “And you want to sleep with her.”

  “No. Damn it. I want to teach her.”

  Lex had to laugh. “Exactly what do you want to teach her, Xan?”

  “Shut up, Baby Brother.”

  “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

  Xander was quiet for several moments before he quietly said, “The old man called me. Or rather had Mum call me.”

  “Fucking fantastic. Whose side are you on, Xander?”

  “Yours. Always yours.”

  Lex glared at his brother. “Then why are you pushing his agenda?”

  “I’m not. I swear. I personally think you should tell the geezer to fuck off like I did. I just worry he’ll pull the trigger on his threat.”

  “Well, he’s welcome to. In a few weeks, I won’t need his money.”

  “It’s more than money you’re walking away from, Lex. It’s not always easy to do. I wouldn’t think any less of you if you took his deal.”

  Blood boiled under Lex’s skin. “After everything that happened, you think I’d take the easy way out? I don’t want anything from him.”

  “And everything comes back to that.”

  Lex ground his teeth. “Of course it comes back to that. We were kids Xan. He was supposed to love us and instead he treated us like we’d tarnished his good name.”

  “Never said he wasn’t a prick.”

  “Well, I want nothing from that prick. I knew that night he didn’t give a shit about us.”

  His brother nodded. “Also true. That night changed everything, but we survived.”

  Had they? Lex didn’t feel like he’d survived. He felt like a storm battered buoy most of the time. “It was a hell of a price to pay.”

  Xander nodded slowly. “Just as long as you understand what that will mean for you.”

  “Yeah, it will mean my freedom.”

  37

  Dinner with his brother had gone infinitely better once they stopped talking about their father. Though, Lex knew next time he’d have to lay off the Scotch. It had been two days and he still hadn’t fully recovered.

  His skin buzzed, his brain was foggy, and his focus was shot to hell. But that could easily be because he knew he was about to see his mystery girl again. His blood rushed just thinking of having her in his arms again.

  When Max had told him to pop ‘round he mentioned Sophie was having some friends around too. He prayed her friend included the American girl. And just like that, the force of the gravitational pull was too strong to ignore. Lex knew he had it bad. He didn’t even know her name and he was a total sap.

  He tried to focus on what the hell Jasper was saying but his brain could only focus on the sounds of Sophie and her friends as they walked in the door. Sophie bounded in with her usual energy, her friends in tow.

  She greeted him with a hug. “Hey Lex. I wanted you to meet my friends, Abbie and Tamsin.”

  So at last he had a name. Lex forced himself to smile and mutter a greeting to Tamsin as he kissed her on both cheeks. When he turned his attention to Abbie, he steeled himself for the current of electricity.

  She met his gaze with a sheepish smile and said, “Actually, Sophie, we’ve already met. Sort of.”

  Lex cleared his throat. “Abbie, it’s nice to meet you, officially.” He shouldn’t touch her again, but he knew if he didn’t, he’d probably regret it the rest of the night. Stepping forward, he took her hand and kissed her twice on the cheek. He took note of her stiff posture again. Yeah, she was definitely not comfortable with touching. He slowly let out a breath before backing away. Her lemony shampoo made his nose tingle. He ached to keep her in his hold. He was in trouble. A shit load of trouble.

  “Earth to Lex, pay attention, mate. This is your birthday, after all. And we’ve got a week to make it epic,” Max muttered.

  Lex rolled his head and tried to massage his neck. “I’m not sure what you need me for. I told you my criteria. I really don’t want it to be seedy. No surprises and no strippers. I want to know what’s coming.”

  As Sophie chatted with her friends, his gaze kept wandering in Abbie’s direction. The memory of her pressed up against him, melting into his arms, snuck into his frontal lobe. And the memory alone was enough to trigger a kick of lust to his groin.

  Jasper, relentless flirt that he was, lost focus on the birthday plans and hit on the girls instead. Specifically Abbie. Lex couldn’t help the pang of jealousy as Jasper turned a full watt grin on her.

  “You’re looking beautiful as always, ladies. Especially you, Abbie.”

  Tamsin just laughed and shook her head. Abbie blinked at Jasper once, then twice, then said, “Do these cheap lines really work on girls?”

  Jasper frowned. “Yes, usually.”

  Abbie shook her head. “I’m not sure why. They could use a dose of sincerity.”

  Lex grinned. So she wasn’t shy or afraid to call things as she saw them. He liked her even more.

  Jasper clutched both hands over his heart and pretended to die. “You wound me. That’s okay though. I have thick skin, and I’m not giving up.”

  There was no way Lex was letting Jasper hold too much of her attention. He smiled at Abbie and asked, “Did you girls have fun at the club the other night?”

  Under her flawless dark skin, he noted a shade of pink. Good, maybe he had her thinking about their dance.

  Abbie stuttered, “Y-yeah, it was fun. I had no idea Jasper was such a good DJ.”

  Fantastic. He’d given her the opening to give Jasper a compliment. Moron.

  “What’s this about no strippers?” Sophie asked.

  Max rolled his eyes. “Lex doesn’t want strippers at his party. We’re trying to convince him he’s got to do it.”

  Abbie met his gaze as she slid into a chair between Tamsin and Jasper. “Why don’t you want strippers? Aren’t you supposed to want strippers?”

  Nick guffawed. “See, Abbie speaks sense. You’re a man. There should be naked women there.”

  “I prefer any naked women I’m around to be there because they want to be, not because they are allegedly working their way through Uni
versity or something.”

  Abbie laughed and the sound filled his head. “What are you going to have if not strippers?”

  Wow, someone who actually cared what he wanted. “Maybe a little poker, some music. Something low key.”

  Max tossed a pen at him. “No way, no how, Lex. It’s your twenty-fifth birthday. It has to be fun. You can be mellow after this party, but for the meantime, Jasper and Nick and I will plan it.”

  “Any chance I’m going to escape it?”

  “Nope,” Max said with a grin.

  “Fine, I give up.” Through his peripheral vision he watched as the girls headed up to one of the bedrooms. Try as he might, he couldn’t keep his mind focused on the conversation. Eventually, the guys stopped including him and just talked football.

  His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he frowned the moment he pulled it out. His father had been calling all day. If he didn’t answer now, there was no way the old man would stop. “I’ll just grab this on the patio.”

  No one paid him any attention as he headed up the stairs to the living room then out onto the patio. “What’s the problem?”

  His father’s voice was terse. “Did you speak to your brother?”

  Damn it, could he get fucking peace from the man? His mind went to a point in his life when he’d needed the old man and how his father hadn’t made the time for him. But now when he wanted something, it was all Lex could do to get away from him.

  “Yes, I did. I also thought I made it clear that you’d have a decision after my birthday, not before.”

  “What is there to think about? It’s not as if you’ll forgo the money you’ve gotten so used to. I have a problem I need you to address in Japan in a few days. You’ll need–”

  “No.” Lex kept his voice controlled, but anger simmered under his skin. He hated how his father treated him like a foregone conclusion. “I’m not going to Japan. I’m not going anywhere until my decision is made.” If he told his father to shove it up his ass now, the old man would know something was up. His assumption that Lex wouldn’t give up money was right, at least partly. If his father got wind of the sale, he would move heaven and earth to stop it, and Lex wasn’t going to let that happen.