Royal Bastard Read online

  “Do you need help?” the guy with the voice like sin and chocolate asked.

  I slanted him a glare. “I got it.”

  Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Holy-Hotness leaned against one of the pillars. “Oh, sure you do. This I have to see.”

  Charity turned to him and said, “She’s fine. Can we go? I thought you were going to show me the sights of the garden.” When she said sights, her gaze drifted over his broad chest.

  “I think I just threw up a little in my mouth,” I muttered to myself.

  “Oh, come on. This will only take a minute since she’s got it.”

  Charity pouted. “You’re serious?”

  His gaze narrowed at that. Then it was like he was seeing her for the first time, and he found her lacking.

  Yeah, pick your bedfellows wisely. This one is a viper.

  When he didn’t budge, she threw me a look that was all daggers and stomped off.

  I tried to extricate myself, and I heard a ripping sound. “My mother is going to kill me.” Naa Darfoor was the newest ‘it’ designer, and this dress cost a fortune, I’m sure.

  “Sweetheart, do you realize that most women are trying to sneak into the ball? Not out of the ball?”

  I finally just hiked the damn dress all the way up to my waist, kicked my legs over, and hopped out of the bush. I could feel his gaze skim over me as I stood. As the heat spread out from the center of my chest, I dropped my skirt, squared my shoulders, and deliberately glared at him. “Thanks for the help.”

  “You said you had it,” he said with a wide, cheeky grin.

  “Little-dicked twat monkey,” I whispered under my breath.

  His bark of laughter filled the still night like an unexpected firecracker.

  I tried to dust myself off and tug my dress into place. For some reason it was pulling in places.

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  Tall and dark, with a jaw so chiseled it could be labeled as jaw porn, he raised his brows. “I get the impression I couldn’t stop you if I wanted to.”

  He was right, he couldn’t stop me. I pointed at the retreating back of Charity Fellows. “Why girls like her? I mean, those girls are obvious. Sure, she’s beautiful, because well, guys are visually motivated. I get it. But she’s also clearly a viper. There is nothing honorable about a girl like that. And let me guess, you didn’t make the approach, she did.”

  He took a step back, even as his brows furrowed warily. “Well, I—"

  I didn’t let him finish. What was the point? “You were having a glass of champagne, enjoying the festivities, thanking God that it wasn’t you who’d gotten married today, and she sidled on up and, and what? What could she possibly have said that made you instantly think, ‘Hey, let’s go out to the gardens and bone like minxes?’”

  Then he did the unexpected. He laughed. A sharp crack of laughter that transformed his face and make him look younger, more approachable, less smug, arrogant, and charming.

  I hated that word, charming. To me, it meant liar. Blatant, bald-faced, saying one thing to your face while doing another kind of liar. Heartless.

  But with the moonlight beaming down on his face while he laughed unashamedly, he was a gorgeous man, who looked… amazing. If I hadn’t been so mad, I might have been awestruck for a moment, even though I knew better than to be struck by how handsome someone was.

  “I mean, let me guess, she offered to show you a good time and do something that no one had ever done for you before? I hate to break it to you, but really there’s only like a set playlist.”

  He chuckled then. His gaze was full of—I don’t know. Was that wonder? Or maybe he thought I was insane. He was examining me like he’d never seen someone like me before. Or he’d just never seen anyone with a brain before. Yeah, that was more likely it. “Oh my God. Are you like this all the time? Because this is awesome.”

  I blinked. “Awesome? You think it’s awesome that I’ve clocked that you’re completely ruled by your hormones?”

  He shrugged. “Well, I am a guy. I’m sure you’ve met one or two?”

  “Boy, have I ever. But I just want to know what makes men susceptible to girls like that, when you have perfectly nice girls running around doing good things, being good people, trying to be all things for all people?”

  He seemed to chew that over for a moment. Then he scrubbed his hand over the light scruff on his jaw. “Honestly, she’s crazy. Guys know that girls like that are up for anything. Absolutely anything. It doesn’t matter how much you polish them up, ball gown or not, beautifully coiffed or not, there’s something crazy in their eyes. She’s not the kind of girl you marry or settle down with. She’s the kind of girl you’d take out to the garden at a palace and see just how crazy she is. It’s that walk on the wild side.” He glanced back to a retreating Charity. “The problem with girls like that is that sometimes they have the tendency to be more crazed than you can handle. It’s dangerous. But that’s part of the appeal. To walk the tightrope and see how far you can go before you fall off or get a bunny boiled. You get the idea.”

  I stared at him. “So, it’s the danger aspect?” I was genuinely curious.

  He shrugged and nodded. “Sorry to break it to you. I know you’re probably looking for some deeper meaning. But guys like the danger. It’s not like we can run out and tussle with a saber-toothed tiger. There are better ways to get your kicks and your adrenaline rushes, but women? Women are the easiest.”

  I stared at him. So, my life was where it was at because men liked danger? I didn’t even have any way to respond to that. “You know what? Whatever. Danger this.”

  I went back to the bush and grabbed my purse and my shoes. I had to use part of my dress to wipe my shoes off, and I could see the dirt marring the gorgeous canary fabric. I really did love the color.

  There’s work to be done. You don’t get to play princess. And then I was stomping off toward the garden. Unfortunately, Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Totally-Worth-a-Bone followed me.

  “Where are you off to in such a hurry?”

  “None of your business.”

  “Well, considering you were sneaking out of the wedding reception, and nobody in their right mind who was invited to party with royalty does that, I have to assume that you’re up to no good, which means that you’re maybe a spy. Or,“ he smirked at me then lifted a brow, “you’re a thief. If so, you have the worse egress route in the history of man.”

  “A thief?” I stopped and glared at him. My eyes were round, and my mouth hung open. “I’ve never stolen anything in my life, thank you very much.”

  The corner of his lips tipped up in a wry smile. “So say all thieves when they get caught.”

  He jogged to catch up with me as I kept on stomping. Where the hell was the parking lot? Was it that far away?

  “I’m serious, what did you steal? Please tell me it was something good. I have been missing a really good lift lately. Diamond necklace?”

  I glared at him and ignored his chattering as I made my way out of the garden.

  “Tell me, was it a brooch? I’ll bet it was something where you can pop the diamonds right out and you wouldn’t even need a loupe.”

  I frowned. “What the hell are you talking about?”

  His gaze slid over me again then finally met mine. “You’re not a thief.”

  “Give the man a cookie. He’s a genius. Of course, I’m not a thief. Who would dare steal from the king? You know there’s a rumor that they have dungeons here, right?”

  He shook his head. “They don’t.”

  “Oh yeah? Then where do you think they’re keeping the traitor?”

  Everyone knew what had happened last year. One of the Royal Guard had launched a plot to kill King Cassius and Prince Sebastian. All because he thought he could somehow take the throne for himself. He’d been successful in killing King Cassius, but Prince Sebastian was saved, all thanks to his Royal Guard, Penny. I wasn’t a romantic, but the whole idea of a Royal Guard saving the wayward prince then fall
ing in love… I wasn’t immune. That was a fairy tale I could get behind.

  The rumor was that Robert Sandstorm was one of the missing royal heirs. There had been rumors for years that the former king, Roland, had illegitimate children. He’d been a bit of a womanizer. It was part of the reason he’d abdicated the throne. There were too many restrictions to being king.

  The Regents Council had passed a law to legitimize royal heirs. Now the rumors in the islands ran rampant. Everyone claimed to be a royal now, but so far, the palace had not announced who they were. And no one had actually seen Robert after he had been arrested. Hence, the dungeon theory.

  My unwanted companion scowled then. “What do you know about the traitor?”

  I blinked rapidly. “What? Nothing. I know nothing about the traitor. I assume the traitor is in the non-existent dungeons, as would any would-be thief.”

  He sighed. “Okay, you’re not a thief. But where are you going in such a hurry? And why aren’t you using the front door? Are you in some kind of trouble?”

  He asked a lot of questions. “It’s a long, stupid story. This royal thing is just not my scene.” I wasn’t telling this random stranger the reason I was running. “While I’m sure that King Sebastian is great and all that jazz, I think that he’s likely a product of a spoilt upbringing. I don’t know the guy, but I can assume.”

  His brows lifted. “Oh really? Do tell.”

  I planted my hands on my hips. “Come on. Even you must have seen all the tabloids from before. He was running around acting like a doofus. Granted, when he met Penny, everything changed. And from what I’ve heard, she’s pretty badass. Actually, she’s one royal I wouldn’t mind meeting. She’s like a real person, you know?”

  So, I tended to a little excited when I talked about the future queen. She was like a hero. First of all, she didn’t need any guy to save her. She’d been the one to save him because she was a Royal Guard. Okay, had been a Royal Guard.

  There was speculation about whether or not she would stay in the Royal Guard or serve in some kind of advisory capacity. As queen, she would obviously have a whole other set of duties. But I kind of liked the idea of her still being Royal Guard. A queen with a job, a real job… in charge of protecting the islands. She was my kind of feminist hero.

  Anyway, after she and the king had met, that had been lights out for her. And, even though I despised romances, it was sweet. Then she’d saved his life, and they’d uncovered his murder plot together. God, she was everything I ever wanted to be. Just as soon as I figured myself out.

  The guy in front of me laughed. “Wow, you are incredible.”

  I scrunched my nose. “Why do you say that?”

  “You should see the way your eyes light up when you talk about Penny. She’s like your ‘she-ro’ or something.”

  “You know, when you’re referring to her, you can just say hero. You don’t have to feminize it up or something.”

  He held up his hands. “Easy does it. Where are you headed in such a rush?”

  “I feel like I already said it’s none of your business. Besides, stranger danger.”

  “I promise you, I don’t bite.” His teeth glided over his lower lip. “Unless you ask real nice.”

  I lifted a brow as I slid him a get-real glance. “Seriously?”

  He blinked in surprise then shrugged. “That usually works.”

  On who? You. It works on you. My lady parts started pulsing. “Does it? Well, you can stop it. Seems I’m immune.”

  The corner of his lips tipped up. And I will admit it was sexy… if you liked that sort of thing.

  He clutched a hand over his heart. “You wound me.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “I would only believe that if I somehow discovered that you had a heart, Tin Man.”

  “Ouch.” But he said it with a laugh.

  I eyed him again. There was something familiar about him. I couldn’t place it though. Did he go to the university here? Is that where I recognized him from? “Aren’t you going back to the party?” Having him follow me was a little disconcerting.

  He shrugged. “I’m just not one for these kinds of parties. No one in there is real. You’re the first real person I’ve met all night.”

  “How do you know I’m real?”

  He laughed. The sound was low and rumbling, and it poured over me like sin and bad judgment mixed in with chocolate and topped with whipped cream. “Well, for starters, I caught you climbing out of the window. None of the debutants in there would dare mess up their makeup or their nails or risk their pretty dresses. So, you’re at least a real person. Now, how about you tell me your name?”

  I shook my head. “Not a chance. Sorry, see you around.”

  I took a left, sure I was headed toward the parking lot, but then I heard the chuckling behind me. I turned around and glared at him. “Just what are you laughing at?”

  “Are you trying to get to the parking lot?”

  “Yes, if you really must know.”

  The laughter only deepened. “You realize you exited the South Tower, right? Parking is the other way.”

  I blinked at him. “No. No. No. No. I left the ballroom, I made a left, then I made the other right, and then –“ Oh shit. I’d been in a hurry and I hadn’t gotten my original bearings right. I was in the South garden, for the love of Christ. He was right. I yanked off my shoes again. I could go faster if I didn’t have to avoid the gravels in my heels. The only problem with that idea was that I was barefoot on gravel. Awesome. “You don’t have to laugh, you know.”

  His chuckle had turned to a full belly laugh as he clutched his hand around his middle and doubled over. “I’m sorry. It’s just your face, your expression…”

  “Jackass.”

  “Oh, come on. Play nice. I can give you a short cut.”

  “A short cut? Why would I trust you?”

  He shrugged. “That’s the thing about trust and faith. It’s sort of a blind thing. Do you want the short cut or not?”

  I had no choice but to follow him. “Fine, but first, what’s your name? I’m going to text my friend, just in case you turn out to be a kidnapper or murderer or something. At least my bestie is going to have your name.”

  “Lucas. I’m Lucas Newsome.”

  I sighed. “Fine. Let’s go Lucas.”

  He grinned at me, and I was temporarily stunned by his smile.

  “So, now that we’re friends, is this a good time to tell you the back of your dress is stuck in your thong?”

  Lucas…

  Money, money everywhere, and not a bauble to steal.

  I downed my scotch, and man did that go down smooth. My brother had fantastic taste. I leaned back against the balcony, the ocean breezes wafting the scent of hibiscus around me, the lapping waves just off in the distance making me long for the warm, azure blue water.

  Had the brunette found her way to wherever she was going? The look on her face and the fury in her eyes when I’d told her about her dress… the thought of it made me smile. She was a sassy pain in the ass, and what a fine ass it was.

  I watched Sebastian and Penny glide over the dance floor. He looked happy, like that bone-deep kind of happiness. Meanwhile, I was desperately trying to avoid the one thing that would make me happy… or at least feel more like myself.

  Stop thinking about the jewels.

  My brain flashed to the brunette with the wide dark eyes and the pouty, kissable mouth. That yellow fabric had glowed against her tanned skin. It made her skin look luminescent. Alas, this line of thinking was no more helpful. I’d blown my shot at something quick and dirty earlier to chase the brunette, so better not to be horny right now.

  The jewels on display were a good distraction,

  Gauging the value of things was a hard habit to break. All around me, all I saw was the obvious wealth displayed in pompous fashion. Not necessarily by Sebastian, but by the other members of the court who wanted to show off and impress the king.

  The king…

>   The king, how was he my brother?

  When all of this went down, he was just some guy.

  It was surreal. Fast forward a year, and I’m co-best man at his wedding, and a goddamn prince. From pauper to prince… never to go back again.

  The events of the last year had been shocking and devastating. I’d found out I had a brother and a father I’d never known. Then I lost that father, and that brother of mine happened to point out that he was a prince and that I was a prince too. It was all a little head spinning.

  Thanks to a little plot to murder the family, it was still a secret to the rest of the world that I was one of the ‘lost royals,’ as the press was calling us. Everyone was under a gag order until we were able to locate our sister. After the murder of our father, Sebastian wasn’t taking any risks.

  Robert Sandstorm, Penny’s ex, had been arrested. Prince Ashton had been exiled. But Sebastian knew there were others involved.

  Out of nowhere, I heard someone say, “And how is the would-be prince?”

  I worked hard to school my response before slanting a glance at the pudgy, ruddy older man to my left. He was around fifty years old, with thinning hair, big, wide blue eyes, and rosy cheeks that looked like maybe he drank too much, or like the sun didn’t agree with him.

  There was a Rolex on his wrist, and he also wore diamond cuff links and one hell of a diamond pin on his lapel. All in all, he was walking around with a hundred and fifty to two hundred grand, easy.

  Stop it. You don’t do that anymore.

  No. No, I didn’t. Nowadays, I didn’t need to steal to survive. Nor did I need to steal to keep my asshole stepfather from beating the shit out of my mom. It wasn’t like I was addicted to it or anything. The thrill, the rush, I didn’t need that in my life. My life was fucking great. I was a newfound prince.

  “Lord Dominic Tressel, right?”

  His brows lifted. “You’re very good with names, young man.”

  “Yes, well, I have been getting tutoring.” That was bullshit. I remembered all names. It was a basic rule. Know your mark. Know who they are. Know who they surround themselves with.